last night

I had the strangest dream...call it stress, or maybe it was just the baby aspirin I took before bed (yes, I actually took "baby aspirin" and no I'm not 50, but how that happened is a different story in and of itself...) but it ranks up there as one of the single most bizarre things I have ever recalled.

The gist of it was this: somehow I discovered that I had a super-power. I could just point in a particular direction and instantly turn whatever was on the wall into a Pop-Tart. Yes! like you eat (or, rather, i eat. a lot). SOOooo there I was, pointing at billboards and turing them into large, frosted Pop-Tarts (to be fair, I made a few strawberry unfrosted as well) -- in mint green and light blue flavors like spearmint and wintergreen.

Anyway, but before you're overcome with envy... as fabulous as this may sound, I quickly discovered that there was a hitch (well, a booming voice told me). While I could turn anything into any flavor of Pop-Tart, I could only turn it into a raw Pop-Tart. That is to say, I couldn't make a toasted Pop-Tart. How frustrating!!!

I should have known it was too good to be true. Welcome to my purgatory.

[the water is warm....but the Pop-Tarts are cold....]